Tuesday, 24 April 2018

KTA-L Attraction

Ever had the feeling you're being stalked?

Trust me, it starts gently. That well meaning friend who wants to know where you're going at the weekend, and "would it be okay to tag along"?

"A village twinning ceremony" you say, certain they'll retract.

But still their enthusiasm abounds; in fact, they find some spurious connection that means they must come along. Something about having lived in both Devon and Wiltshire...

A likely story.

You notice they seem to watch your every move. Behind every door you open, there they are, ready to welcome you. Then come the 'chance' encounters. You go for a quiet coffee, and who should just happen to turn up?

In time, you notice they've mysteriously developed the same interests as you, helping them to explain the most unlikely brushes, often far from home.

East Somerset...

West Somerset...

You start to realise that wherever you are, they're sure to be nearby if you look hard enough.

You even start to imagine you've seen them in the most unlikely of places. They begin to haunt you.

In all weathers...

Take good care. Your stalker can become very possessive, and will hate the thought of you spending time with other friends.

If you plan to, and they get to hear about it (which they surely will), you'll find they'll turn up to steal the show. Mark my words, there'll always be one eye watching everything you do.

Try not to despair. Remember it's because they like you. Do your best to balance their company with solitude whenever you can. Don't hide yourself away, but do find time for the little things you can enjoy alone, in places where they can't get to you.

Like a quiet cup of tea at home with a newspaper...

 Oh gawd.